I fought the door and the door won . . .

So we get called to a male pt. who has headbutted a glass door as a dare, and lost. And I don't mean lost the dare, I mean the door won. We get there and he is holding a towel to his forehead. His buddies are flipping out. "Oh my God, it's GUSHING!!!" "It's like a fountain or something!"
So I pull off the towel, fully expecting to see the laceration of the year. Instead, by some random act of God, he's fine. No joke. The cut is like a quarter of an inch long. Maybe. How in the hell he managed that is beyond me. It has completely stopped bleeding. In fact the truck officer went, "So where is it?" The kid insisted on going to the hospital, where we had a repeat. "So where exactly is the cut?"
College Kids 1, Darwin 0