Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Uncommon criminals and other myths . . .

This is starting to be my new least favorite line from new prisoners: "I'm not a common criminal, quit treating me like one!" Guess what? I treat everyone who comes through my doors the same. Just because you've never been to the county jail does not mean you're special. You have to follow the same rules as everyone else. Sorry. I don't care if you're innocent, that's the court's problem. Don't complain it's not fair that you have to go through the same processing as the girl we've arrested five times for prostitution. Five times this month.

Landfill fires are not "cool" they are not "a training opportunity" or anything else you might try to make them. They suck. The last one took me two months to get the stench off of everything I own. Let's just call a spade a spade . . . it's flaming garbage.

You can not answer medical assessment questions during an actual seizure. If you are faking however, you definitely can. Try harder, we're like American Idol, we've seen it all.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Do I know you?

It's the question every deputy/CO hates while they are out in public off duty. Yeah, you know me. I arrested/processed/restrained/transported you. Do I really want to tell you that in front of my family and yours? Probably not. I usually just smile and then they suddenly realize the connection and quietly move on.
This morning I had a very disturbing encounter while paying for my breakfast. I hand my bill and my cash to the lady behind the counter. I'm not really looking at her because I'm with two dispatchers, all of us in civilian clothes. Halfway through making my change the cashier bursts into tears, and sobbing, tells the other clerk to give me my change as she bolts for the door.
The new cashier looks at me and goes "I guess she knows you." "Uh, not that I'm aware of." I have a fairly good record with faces, and I swear I didn't know the first cashier from Adam. I feel pretty weird about this. Obviously this lady recognizes me and it is not a pleasant reminder of something. I try to be a decent officer and treat people with respect. However when I was a new officer I was a little badge-heavy and that's not something I am proud of. I know that I am a better deputy now than I was for the first two years, and I also know that I could use some improving. I have no idea what I could have possibly done to this woman.
Again, disturbing.