Sunday, May 17, 2009

This job is not for the easily offended . . .

I guess after a while in the jail, you become immune to things that would make most people run screaming into the hills. This includes, but is not limited to, any of the following. Naked people, people masturbating in plain sight, blood, urine, feces, vomit, violent assaults, suicide attempts and genuine craziness.
We have an entire unit dedicated to suicidal/homicidal/mentally disturbed persons. Any officer who has ever worked there can pretty much handle anything. Enter our little federal agent guy who comes in to interview an inmate. He walks past one of the "fishbowl" cells designed for suicidal subjects. Naked lady who is not being compliant with her medication is putting on quite a show for all of us. This includes masturbating, dancing naked and generally inappropriate social behavior.
We're not offended, we understand human behavior can be incredibly odd. Federal agent kid freaks the hell out on me.
"WHAT IS THAT?"
"A female inmate."
"I know. WHAT IS SHE DOING?"
"Do I really have to explain that to you?"
"Can't you DO something?"
"Yeah, put her in the psych unit. Oh, wait. You're here."
"Gross!!"
"What did you expect here? Sunshine and lollipops?"

Kind of makes me want to take him out on the squad . . .

3 comments:

  1. LOL I can the the exchange between ya'll two now. Bet it was priceless!

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  2. When it comes to being "hard-hitting law enforcement professionals," most Feds are pretty damned useless. Give them something to do that's safe -- for them -- and keeps them out of the way of the real cops. And accept the fact that no matter how minuscule their "contribution" they're gonna try to claim sole and exclusive credit.

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  3. Love it. You'd think they'd be trained better by exposure to this crap BEFORE they get in the field.

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