Thursday, April 23, 2009

Bacon and doughnuts . . .

They say you are what you eat. I think I'm screwed. Enter yesterday's post shift "debriefing session" held at the local courthouse eatery before grand jury.
"Sorry to detour the conversation, but I just wanted to let you all know this is delicious bacon."
"Seriously. Amazing. Bacon."
"Woman what is wrong with you? You just downed bacon, eggs, toast, oj, biscuits and gravy and some form of grits. Are you pregnant?"
"My duty belt is a 30", do I look pregnant? No, I'm not."
"Your eating a damn doughnut too?!?"
"Yes. You're interrupting my moment of doughnut zen. Zip it."
"You're going to be in a food coma during testimony."

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