Wait . . . what?

For amusement purposes . . .

This guy comes to visitation at the main complex of our SO. We happen to be large enough to have multiple facilities. His girlfriend is at one of the other complexes; he knows this and tells me this. I inform him that he needs to go to the complex she is housed in to visit her. The response?
"Are you serious?" Funny, that's what I said to my partner once he left.

While seated, in uniform, behind the bullet-proof window with "VISITATION" stenciled above it I get the following. Man walks in, takes a number for the "serving now" line. Makes it up to me and goes "I'm here to see my girlfriend but there's no deputy back in the visitation room and the door is locked."
"Sir visitation is a secure area, I have to hit a button to let you in."
"Yes I know but there's no deputy out here to tell who I'm here to see."
"Sir that's me."
"Really?"
REALLY.

From a phone call we took in intake and receiving:
"I'm worried about my son, he said he is in with some tough guys."
"Ma'am this a jail."
"He's not a violent offender!"
"He's at a minimum security work program."
"Well bad things can happen in there!"
"Tell him these are the best accommodations our county can offer. The only upgrade I have available is disciplinary isolation."